If You Had to Choose “Frumpy” or “Naked”

23 Dec 2014 5 Comments

by Sweet-Water-and-Bitter in Christian Life, Modesty Tags: , , , ,

Just a few thoughts here, as I’m looking over some coverage of an apparent controversy sparked by Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly’s recent outfit and some disparaging comments made about it by Joe Scarborough, host of MSNBC’s Morning Joe.  You can read the article here.

 

mkelly

Before I ever clicked on the article to see what it was all about, I glanced at the photo and thought “My gosh, why is Megyn Kelly baring her chest like that?” I thought back, for a moment, about groundbreaking female news anchors of years gone by, and how hard they tried to be taken seriously, in their buttoned-up blouses and big-shouldered jackets, back in the 80’s.  (Jessica Savitch below.)jessicasavitch

 

Granted, everybody that gets put on TV is usually reasonably attractive, but women a generation ago wanted to be hired for their talent and skill. They didn’t want their looks to distract people from the other fine qualities they had to offer. Nowadays (and I notice this only because my boss likes to keep Fox News on the TV constantly in our office)  Fox seems to have a definite agenda when it comes to their female anchors. They all wear bright, jewel-toned dresses, usually short and sleeveless. Most have long glossy hair and they all wear high heels, which is handy when the camera pans away to capture full-length shots of their nice tanned legs. They’re not going for “serious.” In 2014, they take for granted they’ll be taken seriously, so now we’ve come full circle back to them highlighting their sex appeal. Many will say “So what? What’s wrong with that?” It just happens to be my own personal conviction that highlighting one’s sex appeal is the exact opposite of modesty, and modesty is a Biblical command. So it disappoints me to see female professionals dressing this way, especially in a setting where the entire world has a chance to see and critique them graphically and mercilessly.

 

newshoochies

 

Here’s the thing about clothing choices: People who want to criticize you are going to criticize you no matter what you do! I happen to find modest clothing beautiful, but thousands disagree. So if your detractors are going to criticize you for one thing or another, which would you, as a Christian, prefer to be accused of–frumpiness or nakedness?

Let me restate that a different way.

  • People who like you will find something to admire about you. They might very well notice your lovely blouse or your cute shoes, but if people like you for your kindness, your personality, your sense of humor, your intelligence, your work ethic, and so forth, they really don’t need to see your naked skin.
  • But if they dislike you, they will cut you to ribbons about one thing or another. They might criticize your personality, they might think you’re not very smart or not a nice person. But if they decide to go after your physical appearance…well, I don’t know about you, sister, but being caught in a state of undress in front of  people who don’t like me sounds to me like the stuff nightmares are made of.

Let’s consider for a moment, women who put their bodies on display, clearly hoping (as we all do) to be liked and admired. Don’t deny it, nobody chooses clothes because they think, “Oh boy, everybody will HATE this!  They’ll think I look terrible in it!” Of course not; we choose things that we like, but we hope others will approve of them, too, and possibly give us a compliment. So I’ll venture to assume when women choose clothing that exposes them,  they are hoping that whoever sees them will LIKE, admire, and approve of what they’re displaying. Deep down, let’s just be frank here–you don’t show or accentuate your chest, rear end, stomach, etc.  unless you’re expecting male onlookers to think favorably of your bodily features…and of you…and of the fact that you’re showing off what you’re blessed with. Am I wrong? No?

Well congratulations, honey, you showed your your breasts to a man and he happily looked at them. Wow, how special are you?! Oh wait…you’re not special at all. Men will look at any naked body part that presents itself, and who knows, if he likes you, a certain kind of man will like you even better for providing some scenery.

But then there are those who don’t like you, don’t appreciate the peep show, don’t think you have anything worth showing off, don’t want you to become a stumbling block for them, or whatever the case may be. And how will you feel then, standing there displaying the most private parts of your body for the world to judge, and being met with scorn and disgust?

miley

 

Remember how the world reacted to Miley’s performance (above)? It’s just one sad example of an attempt to be sexy gone horribly wrong, and I cannot think of many things that must shame a woman more than  baring all she’s got and being met with a reaction of, “Ugh, no thanks.”

How to Stay Warm in a Dress

02 Nov 2014 19 Comments

by Sweet-Water-and-Bitter in Beauty, Looks, Modesty Tags: , ,

Victorian

Are you new to wearing dresses, and wondering how you’ll manage your first winter as a beautiful, feminine, modest dress-wearer? First of all, congratulations on your decision to dress with modesty. You will never regret looking classy and respectable, and  you will soon appreciate the very significant differences in the treatment you  receive by presenting yourself  as a lovely lady instead of a hot chick. I want to encourage you to make it through the upcoming winter without “growing weary in well-doing,” so I offer you some tips.

First of all, know that YOU CAN DO THIS. There is no question about it! Generations of our ancestors managed their lives wearing dresses in all sorts of weather, without the benefit of central heat, by the way. Most of the time, the adjustment to be made here is psychological in that a dress is not actually impeding your functionality, you simply feel funny wearing one to do certain things. This may be because you don’t own the most suitable type of dresses or skirts for every activity yet, but that will come with time and perseverance. You can do it, and you’ll be so glad you did.

If you work in an office or other indoor setting, please FORGET the idea of wearing dress shoes such as pumps, and leaving your calves bare or covered only by pantyhose (if anybody wears those anymore!). You will be just like some of my silly coworkers, who walk in the door daily in skimpy dress and immediately start complaining that they’re freezing. Be wise about this! The weather won’t change to accommodate your clothes, so you must change your clothes to fit the weather. What you need are some BOOTS. I myself can hardly wait to start wearing boots each year, because for one thing, you can wear your favorite comfortable socks and nobody will ever know, plus you don’t need to be concerned with how your legs look! If your boots seem to look funny, chances are that there is a wrong-sized gap between the top of them and the bottom of your skirt. I think it’s best if there is either NO gap (so your skirt comes down over your boots) or a gap of several inches (if you have that much leg). Just a slight gap looks like a mistake, similar to the look of “high-water” pants. I would caution you, though, when leaving a gap, that “sexy” is not the look you are going for. Keep your skirt at a decent length, and please avoid blatantly sexy stiletto heels. You do realize, my dear innocents, that when you wear shoes like that, it tempts men to picture you wearing ONLY the shoes? I would love to have a man comment and back me up on that, because I am absolutely sure of it.

You are going to want to have skirts or dresses of thicker, sturdier material, that the wind will not cut through. In hot weather, I tend to wear very lightweight, flowing skirts, but winter is the time to change to khaki, corduroy, or thick knits, and denim for casual wear. Obviously, longer is warmer.

Your secret weapon is what you wear on your legs. You will need some or all of the following: tights, leggings, and thermal underwear! Tights are nice when the weather is not biting cold but just a bit chilly, and bare legs would look oddly summery. They are also nice when you don’t feel like boots and would rather wear a mary-jane or some other style of shoe. Leggings are warm and come in all sorts of colors and patterns, but be careful with those patterns if you’re a mature lady. Not all are becoming to us. A benefit to leggings is that they are footless, and since we’ve already decided you’ll be wearing your favorite socks, you don’t want your feet to get all overheated indoors. Thermal underwear is for SERIOUS cold! In the past I owned some actual “long-john” style with the sort of checked-looking pattern. I actually prefer those, because they have a band at the ankle that keeps them from moving around. (Thermal sets are great to sleep in, too, because they stay rather close to your body so they keep drafts from going up your clothes, and don’t get all twisted around as you toss and turn.) Now that I live in Florida where it’s not very cold for very long, I have not been able to find that style, but I have some “Cud’l Duds,” purchased at Walmart, that serve the same purpose.

Finally, if you run low on ideas or have no modest dressers in your daily life that you’d like to emulate, PINTEREST IS A GOLD MINE! Approximately one bazillion people (just kidding) have Pinterest boards labeled “modesty” or “modest clothes” and so forth. I’m sure you could even search “modest winter” or “skirts and boots” or whatever it is you’re trying to work with.

I wish you a wonderful winter and a delightful holiday season…Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Year! Be beautiful be festive, be WARM, and be modest and classy, too!

 

 

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