Announcing PPM— Petite, Plus-Sized, Modest!

PPM Stockimages
Dear Readers, I am excited to announce the opening of my new Amazon store, Petite Plus-Sized Modest!

I personally experience a serious dilemma every time I shop for clothes, and what may be a pleasure and a hobby for some women is a frustrating ordeal for me, due to the limited selection of clothing that fits all of my criteria at once. I had long dreamed of a store specializing in petite-plus clothing, and thanks to the wonder of the Internet, I was able to create one myself!

What I have done and will continue to do with this store is to comb through the bazillion clothing items that are not available in our size, in order to present you with those that are. While not everything in the store is technically sized “petite plus” (because there’s barely anything in existence sized that way), I have tried my very best to hand-select items that I believe will stand a great chance of working on a frame that is both plus-sized and short. I don’t know about you, sisters, but the clothes I normally find in stores such as L. Bryant are cut way too big for me–the shoulders are too wide, the sleeves are too long, they are simply made for a woman who is much larger framed. I have come home from many shopping trips almost in tears, especially when shopping for a special occasion. [Note, as of this moment I have not yet added the Special Occasion dresses to the store because I want to take my time with them…but they are coming! A LOT more stuff is coming, including shoes and accessories!]

Please, if you will, share this post with your friends via Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Pinterest! And since you won’t want to single out anyone as being plus-sized, well, you’ll just have to share with them all! Since the clothes are modest, maybe your church group would like to know as well.

This blog contains affiliate links, and I thank you so much for your support of this project! I hope it will prove helpful to many! Now if only I can stop myself from buying all the cool stuff I’m finding! SHOP NOW!

If You Had to Choose “Frumpy” or “Naked”

Just a few thoughts here, as I’m looking over some coverage of an apparent controversy sparked by Fox News anchor Megyn Kelly’s recent outfit and some disparaging comments made about it by Joe Scarborough, host of MSNBC’s Morning Joe.  You can read the article here.

 

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Before I ever clicked on the article to see what it was all about, I glanced at the photo and thought “My gosh, why is Megyn Kelly baring her chest like that?” I thought back, for a moment, about groundbreaking female news anchors of years gone by, and how hard they tried to be taken seriously, in their buttoned-up blouses and big-shouldered jackets, back in the 80’s.  (Jessica Savitch below.)jessicasavitch

 

Granted, everybody that gets put on TV is usually reasonably attractive, but women a generation ago wanted to be hired for their talent and skill. They didn’t want their looks to distract people from the other fine qualities they had to offer. Nowadays (and I notice this only because my boss likes to keep Fox News on the TV constantly in our office)  Fox seems to have a definite agenda when it comes to their female anchors. They all wear bright, jewel-toned dresses, usually short and sleeveless. Most have long glossy hair and they all wear high heels, which is handy when the camera pans away to capture full-length shots of their nice tanned legs. They’re not going for “serious.” In 2014, they take for granted they’ll be taken seriously, so now we’ve come full circle back to them highlighting their sex appeal. Many will say “So what? What’s wrong with that?” It just happens to be my own personal conviction that highlighting one’s sex appeal is the exact opposite of modesty, and modesty is a Biblical command. So it disappoints me to see female professionals dressing this way, especially in a setting where the entire world has a chance to see and critique them graphically and mercilessly.

 

newshoochies

 

Here’s the thing about clothing choices: People who want to criticize you are going to criticize you no matter what you do! I happen to find modest clothing beautiful, but thousands disagree. So if your detractors are going to criticize you for one thing or another, which would you, as a Christian, prefer to be accused of–frumpiness or nakedness?

Let me restate that a different way.

  • People who like you will find something to admire about you. They might very well notice your lovely blouse or your cute shoes, but if people like you for your kindness, your personality, your sense of humor, your intelligence, your work ethic, and so forth, they really don’t need to see your naked skin.
  • But if they dislike you, they will cut you to ribbons about one thing or another. They might criticize your personality, they might think you’re not very smart or not a nice person. But if they decide to go after your physical appearance…well, I don’t know about you, sister, but being caught in a state of undress in front of  people who don’t like me sounds to me like the stuff nightmares are made of.

Let’s consider for a moment, women who put their bodies on display, clearly hoping (as we all do) to be liked and admired. Don’t deny it, nobody chooses clothes because they think, “Oh boy, everybody will HATE this!  They’ll think I look terrible in it!” Of course not; we choose things that we like, but we hope others will approve of them, too, and possibly give us a compliment. So I’ll venture to assume when women choose clothing that exposes them,  they are hoping that whoever sees them will LIKE, admire, and approve of what they’re displaying. Deep down, let’s just be frank here–you don’t show or accentuate your chest, rear end, stomach, etc.  unless you’re expecting male onlookers to think favorably of your bodily features…and of you…and of the fact that you’re showing off what you’re blessed with. Am I wrong? No?

Well congratulations, honey, you showed your your breasts to a man and he happily looked at them. Wow, how special are you?! Oh wait…you’re not special at all. Men will look at any naked body part that presents itself, and who knows, if he likes you, a certain kind of man will like you even better for providing some scenery.

But then there are those who don’t like you, don’t appreciate the peep show, don’t think you have anything worth showing off, don’t want you to become a stumbling block for them, or whatever the case may be. And how will you feel then, standing there displaying the most private parts of your body for the world to judge, and being met with scorn and disgust?

miley

 

Remember how the world reacted to Miley’s performance (above)? It’s just one sad example of an attempt to be sexy gone horribly wrong, and I cannot think of many things that must shame a woman more than  baring all she’s got and being met with a reaction of, “Ugh, no thanks.”

Christian…When Convenient

Praying-David Castillo Dominici

(Image by David Castillo Dominici, courtesy of freedigitalimages.net)

On Facebook the other day, someone shared a blog post (sorry, don’t remember the blog) by a lady who was explaining why her family chose not to make Santa Claus a part of their Christmas celebration. (I’m sure a number of blogs have weighed in about that topic lately.) Although my children are big now, they believed in Santa when they were little, as did I. However, this lady’s blog post was so well-considered and thoughtful that I found myself thinking “Whew…glad it’s too late for me to have to examine my conscience about THAT issue!” Quite frankly, I couldn’t disagree with a thing she said. For example, she wanted Jesus to be the focus of Christmas, and she also felt that by tricking her children about Santa, they might doubt her veracity on more important issues later. That’s very true. But dang it, it’s just not very much FUN! It conflicts with my fondness and nostalgia for the magic of Santa.

Do you see what I’m getting at, here? I do NOT wish to start a comment war, or even have any discussion at all, really, about whether or not your family does the Santa thing. That’s not my point at all. My point is that I was convicted by this woman’s post to wonder how many OTHER truths we might avoid, discard, or gloss over, because, well, they just interfere with our normal life and the things we enjoy doing. Boy, we hate when faith gets pushy, don’t we? It’s easy to be Suzie Church-girl on Sunday morning, but the rest of the week is tougher. We hate when truth sticks its nose into our non-church-related business.

I knew a lady once–true story, y’all–who was so very religious that she would not refer to a deviled egg as a DEVILED egg. She called it a “dressed egg.” LOL. She would bow her head to bless her food in a business meeting or whatever, she didn’t care, because that was what she felt was right. And I could give many other examples of her careful Christian conduct. Yet she lived with a man she was not married to! (Well, he wouldn’t marry her and she couldn’t afford to live alone…what was she supposed to do, move back in with her parents? ANSWER: Yes.)

I know another lady who went to Bible college and was at church every time the doors opened, yet her husband came home early from a trip and caught her with a fellow church member. (Well, her husband was a jerk and her love for him had died, while this other man was so nice and kind to her. She just couldn’t help herself! ANSWER: Yes, she could have.)

I know a businesswoman who is very devout, yet that does not stop her from capitalizing on the misfortunes of her customers and accepting a payment for sending them to a collections attorney, instead of making every effort to contact them herself. (But that’s just business, isn’t it? ANSWER: No.)

As for me (I’m sure I’m guilty of a multitude, but this is the first thing that came to mind) I know that I had a long-term, deep-seated longing to wear dresses only, for years and years before I actually did it. I felt drawn to that and wanted to do it, but dang it, y’all, I didn’t want people to think I was a weirdo! Who goes to the grocery store or does outdoor activities in a DRESS?! (That’s just good fashion sense, right? Answer: No. Not for me, anyway.) (P.S. When I did finally switch to dresses-only, even my OWN HUSBAND didn’t notice…for TEN MONTHS. Ha! Just think of how much time and energy we spend worrying about what other people think of us and how we look and what we do, when the truth is, they’re worrying about their own selves!)

I think most of us can be ever-so-Christian, until Christian standards of conduct conflict with something we really want to do, or how we’re perceived by those whose opinions we care about. And I don’t necessarily think that’s being an intentional hypocrite, it’s just being an imperfect person, still under construction, still growing…as long as we are willing to examine our hearts.

Although my children are too old for me to have to reconsider the Santa question, this idea of being Christian-when-convenient reminds me of a line from a secular song, “One of Us.” You may remember it goes, “What if God was one of us?” The line I’m thinking of is one that says, “If God had a face, what would it look like? And would you want to see, if seeing meant that YOU WOULD HAVE TO BELIEVE, (capitals are mine) in things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints, and all the prophets…” The line always struck me rather funny…when you consider all the atheists and agnostics in the world…if they could suddenly have absolute physical proof that God was real, wouldn’t they be awfully bummed out to know that they could no longer go through life disregarding Him?! Talk about a lifestyle changer!

And what about us? Are there certain faith-based things that we do consistently, not so much because they are right but because we love to do them anyway? Then how about the opposite? Are there areas in our lives that we keep securely set aside in the “not-faith-related” box? Things we wouldn’t say/do/drink/participate in/watch/listen to…if our pastor or our church friends could see us? God sees us, though. We already know that, but sometimes we live as though we don’t. This is probably something we could all give some prayerful thought to.  And then, some action.

 

My Heart Was Hurting Today

awake 2

The painting you see is called Awakening, by an artist named Bessie Pease Gutmann. I found a little framed print of this painting long ago, and ever since, I have used it as a symbol of my first little boy, Alex. He was born on December 5th, 1990, and died on December 16th. This was due to a car accident that occurred at the very end of my pregnancy, and I wrote more about it in the post If Your Tragedy Had Never Happened. I have some pictures of him, but from the moment he was born, he was intubated and hooked up to all manner of wires and monitors which would only distract you from the beautiful, dark-haired boy that he was. So I keep those private.

It has been a long time and I have two beautiful living children, but I think of Alex every day. I visited his resting place over Thanksgiving and told him that very thing.

Others who have lost a loved one around the holidays will understand how hard it is when everything that reminds you of Christmas reminds you of grief. Some years, for one reason or another, I get through it alright. This doesn’t appear to be one of those years, but I had not mentioned anything to my husband or anyone else.

This morning I was sitting at work, trying to concentrate, but my mind kept leading me down paths I didn’t want to travel. I remember a thousand little flashes…things I saw, things people said, how it felt to kiss a baby’s head for the first time. Sometimes I find myself just staring into space and I’m back at the accident scene, or back home in those cold days when it was all over, or in the places between; hospitals, the funeral home. Sometimes whole conversations come back to me. So I was having a bad morning, quietly, all to myself with my back turned to my coworkers,  I found myself in tears over and over.

Then the phone rang and it was my husband, calling a couple of hours earlier than normal. “Hi!”  he said. “I just took an ornament off the tree at work, with the name of a little fella who needs some gifts this Christmas. He’s two years old and the list says he wants some race cars and a football.We’ll go shopping this weekend.”

I had no idea there was a needy children’s donation drive happening at his work, and he had no idea I was sitting there with tears in my eyes, missing a little boy who never had a Christmas.

But God knew, and I felt my pain was acknowledged at that moment. I wouldn’t have said a word–I tend to hold it all inside–but God sent me a way to let my husband know I was having a hard time this year, so that he can support and care for me.

There’s no fancy ending to this post. I just wanted to share that.

 

Holiday Happenings

Family Thanksgiving 2014Hello there! You might think I’ve expired, but actually, like most folks around this time of year  I’ve just been very busy! The photo above is my family (Brian, Bliss, me, and Brandon) taken in front of my in-laws’ house on the day after Thanksgiving. We traveled to Georgia to visit, and there was no time to write any new posts for this week. Anyway I noticed that blog traffic was dead so I figured we were ALL out shopping and traveling and such, and we would meet again when life settles back down. I hope you all had a nice Thanksgiving!

To those who read my post about making money with Fiverr, I had to set my Fiverr profile to “on vacation” just to get a minute to breathe while I was out of town! I turned it back on yesterday and have already had two inquiries. Plus, I finally heard back from Textbroker (another place to make money writing content) and was rated a four-star writer. (Yay! Five is the best but four is OK. I admit I am not a textbook grammarian, I just kinda play it by ear.) Tonight I’m going to get my profile filled out over there, because reportedly one can make enough money that I might eventually fulfill my dream and not have to go to an office every day. We shall see!

peacock

Lilla Rose is going strong and I am selling clips to everybody I know! Normally I don’t push this aspect of it, but would YOU be interested in being a Lilla Rose consultant? All it takes to get started is around $50, and for that they will send you five hairclips (which would cost you more than $50 if you ordered retail) PLUS all the catalogs and various supplies you’ll need to sell to your friends. Trust me, it is NOT HARD to get people to buy. I sent a catalog to work with my husband and he brought home $75 worth of orders just from putting the catalog on the table in the break room last week. Email me if you’re interested. sweetwaterandbitter@gmail.com

Finally, I’ll just mention that I’m on the launch team for a new book entitled Choosing Him All Over Again, by Juana Mikels. I’m reading it now and will tell you more about it in January. For now, you might want to visit Juana’s blog to get to know her and a little more about the book. As you might glean from the title, it’s a story about leaving her husband…the same husband she’s now been married to for 33 years! I’m sure a lot of us have been at that point or close to it, and need to share our stories with younger wives.

I wish you all the joy of the holiday season, included a belated Happy Thanksgiving! Let me know what you all have been up to!

Kim

 

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